The Batman Story

By: James Taylor

Gotham City was in the middle of its biggest crime wave ever. Everything was getting stolen -money, jewelry, paintings, and ...candy. For a long time Commissioner Gordon and his men were clueless about who was the cause of all of the crime.

Finally, Gordon went to his last resort -- calling in the caped crusaders, Batman and Robin. After having explained the grave matter, the duo set to work. They approached the Acme Bat-Criminal Detector and placed the records of all the villains they knew on the board. Robin started the detector -- "Eenie Meenie Mynie Moe. Catch a criminal by the toe!" he said as he searched through the records. When he finished, his finger was on the Joker. They realized that there was something wrong when they remembered that the Joker died a month ago when he fell 50 stories into a giant vat of gopher guts and drowned. Realizing his mistake, Robin tried the detector again. He repeated the Eenie Meenie Mynie Moe process again, but even faster. This time Robin's finger landed Cat Woman. On considering the selection, they both realized once again there was a mistake. According to the records, she was just put in prison a week ago and was still there. Pushing Robin out of the way, Batman took over, and used the same procedure to determine the villain. As he uttered the word "toe", Batman's finger landed on the Penguin. Thinking back for a moment, Batman remembered that the Penguin escaped from prison just before the crimes began.

Quickly Batman and Robin set out to find the Penguin. Through all the streets they searched, but there wasn't a trace of him. Next, they carefully searched through each building in Gotham. Once again, there wasn't a trace. After the buildings, Batman and Robin went down into the smelly sewers, but still no Penguin. On the verge of giving up, Batman then remembered to check the rooftops of Gotham. They climbed to the top of the highest building. Carefully they looked over all the rooftops, and out in the distance they spotted him. Quickly they swung over to the building that the Penguin was on, and surrounded him. Unfortunately, the Penguin couldn't fight very well. He also had trouble trying to get away, since he forgot to bring his umbrellas with him. It was easy for the duo to capture the fowl villain.

When the Penguin finally gave up, they had one small problem -- how to get him to the Commissioner's office, which was in the next building. Unfortunately, there wasn't a door to get off of the roof. This meant they would either have to climb all the way down, or jump across to the next building. They decided, although a little dangerous, to try jumping to the next building. Batman was to go across first. Next the Penguin, and then Robin. Batman got up to the edge and looked around. Then he jumped into the air. As he traveled through the air, Superman came flying through the air and hit the Dark Knight. When he landed on the other side, he turned around to shake a fist at the Man of Steel and warned him to stay in his own stories. It was the Penguin's turn to cross over to the other rooftop. Looking at the great distance and the fear of possibly getting hit by a superhero, he begged for Robin to help him get across by jumping with him. Robin, being the good sport that he was, agreed to jump with him. They grabbed hands, and stepped up to the edge of the building. Looking both ways, they then jumped on the count of three. Through the air they sailed. Just before they got to the other side, they were hit by a rock, and fell.

THE MORAL OF THE STORY: you can hit two birds with one stone.